LOL, where am I?

A magical place where buyers don’t use punctuation, don’t know a computer monitor from the actual computer, and expect you to drop the price by about half.

‘Cause, you know, they have to buy tools to build the computer too, so maybe I can drop the price? Also, building computers is easy, “Youtube will show a tutorial”.

Had a salad for lunch. Salad with chicken pieces on it and balsamic vinaigrette. Even a little hummus on the side.

Then I went back to the catering table- that’s when I saw the chocolate cake.
I stared for a beat, and as I walked to the trashcan to toss away my empty plate, I thought of nothing.

Then I walked back to my desk with these empty thoughts, feeling as if I had a breath of air I could never get through my lungs.

He didn’t lose his life savings; this is what he’s been saving up for his whole life.

Whenever I hear jeggings being spoken of negatively, I tell them to stop.
It’s a serious concern of mine that they may go away someday.

I normally don’t speak out about my job, but right now I am drunk on scotch, have had little-to-no work today, and just got my highest score ever on Donkey Kong on the cabinet upstairs, and I’m still on the clock.
And they provided both the scotch and the Donkey Kong.

catscatssarahcats:

Personally I think everyone does an incredibly bang-up job on the track, but I digress.
Count down from 3-16 with El-P.

Straight shots of the sterno plus, wick stuck in the bottle empty
Three blocks to the target we light it and lob it hard at Sentry
Four pigs of the oinking variety guard the market entry
Five minutes of flames and then aim the whistle my father lent me
Six o’clock we meet up and divvy the shells among the youngins
Seven continents in the shit and smoke like it’s fuckin London
Just before they ate up the funds our harmony love was bumping
Now government issue nines and point em where your blood is pumping
Tend to mop up these muttering zombies talker pieces
El’ll ven(t) on you harder than Fukushima breezes
In the end when a dozen or so ajourn to reason
You’ll find the verdict return corrupted in murderous seasons
With inverted 31’s and other unlucky omens
Thats why I chug 7 and 7’s til I’m fucking homeless
And every time you think my fifteen minutes of fame are up
I’ll spit another sixteen to prove to the world I fucking own it

I’m jealous of their talent.

Told co-workers I have Into the Darkness on my flashdrive and offered it to them.

THEM: 0
ME: 8